a little sip
a little dip
a little chatter
a little flirting
a lot more drinking
and how he looks don't matter
a little shame
a little time
a little late
a little test
a little unexpected
a little unprepared
a lot of conversations
a little compromise
a little wedding
a lot of wedding dress
a little place
a little bootie
a little bottle
a little sleep
a lot of tantrums
a little fighting
a lot of questions
a little regret
a lot of begging
a little forgiveness
a little more time
a little sister
a lot less sleep
a little more work
a lot more time

a hollow wind blows through me
melts my resolve
brings tears to my eyes
catches in my throat
tries to choke me

echos and whispers in the breeze
i hear them and think it's you

it's not

odd hobbies

A girl I know on facebook
posted a picture
of an animal skeleton she saw on the ground

I wanted to click and "share." 
It made my heart ache.
Not the dessicated remains of some feral cat
or squirrel
or rat
or racoon
but knowing that you would see it too
and take the same photo
capturing the universal
trapped in a pile of bones

Each day is this.
Moments trying not to think
about how you'd like this or that.
What you might be doing now. 
Who you've done, if anyone.

Wondering if words could span
3,000 miles
and bridge the gap.
But I can't speak out of turn
and so the distance grows
between me

and

you.

knot in the stomach

ache in the chest

never again

will the mind know rest  

awaiting an answer

for a question unasked

reading a face

that is never unmasked  

listening to truth

embellished and stretched

outwardly smiling

but inwardly wretched

striving to change

while stuck in a rut

hoping for closure

there's always a "but"

wheels keep on spinning

world always turns

no one is winning

heart always yearns